Ranch Dressing

This is a recipe I adapted from The Kid-Friendly ADHD & Autism Cookbook. I will tell you right now, like with most GFCF substitutes, it is not as good as real Ranch dressing. The flavor is right–which is awesome, because of course you can’t even get that, a lot of the time–but the texture is just a tad bit grainy. If you’re eating it on smooth salad leaves, you will probably notice. If, on the other hand, you’re dipping crunchy things like carrots in it, you probably won’t. And that was precisely why I added this recipe to my repertoire early on: we had spent a lot of time convincing my son that it was fun to eat vegetables if they were dipped in Ranch dressing, and I was not about to let that victory go to waste just because it turns out Ranch dressing is toxic for him.

I make this in pretty small batches, but you can double it for a more reasonable quantity. Start with 1/4 cup of finely ground almond meal. You could use cashews or sunflower seeds if you prefer, but then you’d have to grind them yourself in a food processor. I already have this stuff on hand, so that’s what I use.

Then, 1/2 Tablespoon of potato starch. I don’t recommend substituting corn starch here, because it just doesn’t get as smooth, and this recipe needs all the smoothness it can get. Actually, I often end up using potato starch in my recipes that call for corn starch for this very reason. It’s one of the few specialty ingredients that costs about the same as its mainstream counterpart, so why not?

If you want, you can blend it a little at this point, just to see if you can get that almond meal any smoother. I can’t really decide if it helps or not, since I’m usually not the one eating it. Then add 1/2 teaspoon of salt. Please note that this photo is not incredibly washed-out, it is actually an artistic statement on the blinding simplicity of our most fundamental seasoning. I did it on purpose, I swear.

Then 1/2 Tablespoon of canola oil…

And about 1/2 cup of water. I tend to leave it a little on the short side, because you can always add more later if it’s too thick, but you don’t want to have to cook it for too long trying to thicken a mixture that’s too thin.

And 1/4 teaspoon of garlic powder.

And blend away!  (Man, my kids and I could spend all day watching videos on that site. Brutal destruction of objects never gets old.) You could also do this in a food processor, it’s your choice. Blend for at least a few minutes on the highest speed, in order to get it as smooth as possible.

Pour the resulting mixture into a small pan, and cook over low heat while stirring constantly.

Okay, not quite constantly, you can take a few seconds to add in the seasonings. This is 1/4 teaspoon of parsley.

1/4 teaspoon of dried chives…

And just a pinch of dill. Or a couple of shakes, or whatever. A really tiny amount.

It will look like too much seasoning at first, because everything will be floating on the top. But don’t worry, as the sauce thickens the little green flecks will settle into the middle and bottom of it too, and have a more balanced appearance. And speaking of thickening, it should be starting to do that already, so make sure you keep stirring. Burning the bottom of this is the last thing you want to do.

Once it’s nice and thick like Ranch dressing ought to be, pour it into a container of your choice and chill it in the fridge. This little plastic tub actually came from a specialty food store in my neighborhood, and I tricked my kid and just kept refilling it after I figured out how to make this stuff myself–at a much cheaper price, I might add. You know how much that original container cost me? $9.00. … Nine. Dollars. I had no choice but to learn how to make it myself, after I ran out of arms and legs.

Happy Eating!

GFCF Ranch Dressing

1/4 cup Bob’s Red Mill Almond Meal
1/2 TBS potato starch
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 TBS canola oil
1/2 cup water
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp parsley flakes
1/4 tsp dried chives
pinch dried dill